As a therapist, my primary goal that each and every person who walks in my door carries is a deep desire for having love@home. It’s by believe and experience that no matter what is their presenting problem by creating love@home their healing will occur, become complete and life lasting. I became a therapist out of my interest and belief in the family. It all started during my sophomore year in college in Dr. Barlow’s class. Dr. Barlow was not only a superb professor and marriage and family therapist who wrote an editorial column in the local newspaper and author of several books, he was a family man. His family was his real pride and joy above and beyond all his accomplishments. He gave me a love for the family”. I knew I wanted to be just like him when I grew up.
For a class activity he invited us all over to his home one Saturday afternoon for a party–or so he said. I have come to realize it was to expose us to family life as he emphasized the good of the system. He had a big beautiful home w/ a big yard surrounded trees and grass with country flair. he introduced us to his wife and some of his kids. He had a total of eight children-some already grown and married. However, he did not pretend to be the “Brady Bunch” or Cleaver family, just an ordinary bunch w/ a vision. His simple message was when you build a family upon a foundation, all comes together for the good of individual and the whole–hence, good for society. His humility endeared us to him even more as he taught that perfection was not necessary to achieve greatness and happiness for our future, rather a desire and passion to love one another and the whole of the system. This excited my heart. As a little girl, my biggest grown up dream was to be wife and mom. I envisioned myself in the kitchen adorned in an apron making Christmas cookies, surrounded by my kids as my husband walks in the door in his three-piece suit and brief case in hand after a long day of work. Now I, too, could have that and more.
Now here I sat as a college student feeling this deep drive to be a “Dr. Barlow”. A feeling of being born again came to mind, as a surge of energy coursed through my body and an appetite for learning blossomed. I couldn’t deny the long forgotten visions which now resurfaced of being a “nurse Nightingale” and “Bob Newhart”. I was amused by the familiarity of it all. I felt emerged among mentors who thought like I thought. Who yearned to help another overcome the challenges before them. Who were happy people themselves. Now I also had a real life mentor in front of me, who was showing me how to manifests these traits in my behaviors and emanate them from my being and how all this can accomplish the good they all had achieved.
Today, I am a wife, mother and I am a therapist too. Yes, I have arrived. I have it all…only to find that I have more to go. As you see, as I have expanded from being simply Cheri who was a college student to a wife, mother and therapist, I realize the value of expanding…expanding in all areas. Really what I am attempting to say, building “family” from the world.
The secret behind this happening is to first, being a better wife day by day, a caring mother and readying myself to be a hands-on grandmother and second–the order being imperative-building my career to reach a greater number of people as a means of sharing my experiences and my knowledge–in turn, learning from them. In the end “love @ home” expands to the world.
So, as I have learned, simply by being available, willing, charitable and open, I can be a positive influence and expand my circle of love and the world is my family.