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Reflections – How Have I Arrived at the Place That I Am?

You may ask, as I ask myself, after 35 years of being a renowned trauma therapist why would I desire to become a life coach? Now I am not the first therapist turned coach, yet I do find my reason may come from a different place. I love what I do, I have a passion for treating people, my work is my play! And I love working with trauma.

Yet, the more I learn about the impact trauma has on individuals, families, communities and society, the more I realize therapy may not be enough to rise above the negative ramifications of the impact of trials, tragedies and losses.

Trauma imprints its mark on us, and if left untreated, it’s scaring is not unlike a neon sign, with its blaring mark. This mark ripples through every fiber of life, and for many, it’s a constant reminder, offering no rest from the torture it inflicts, years after the initial incident.

As a therapist, ‘treating’ the client through their recovery is an imperative step toward healing. My training affords me the skills and knowledge to understand the impact tragedy has on their life and to help them get back on track.

However, many times clients leave therapy ‘recovered’ yet still lacking the tools to use their story to help them align their life toward BE-coming whole again, especially when they re-enter the world where their trauma occurred and may still live. Hence, their only recourse is to return to therapy to maintain their recovery or fall prey to a repeat episode, or struggle thriving in a sabotaging environment.

As I witnessed this becoming a pattern versus a situational episode, I realize that full healing of trauma cannot happen when only addressed in the therapy room. It’s rippling effects spread out and infuse into the environment and reshape the family and community like the spread of unchecked cancer within the body.

A trauma-riddled life needs more than therapy. This revelation was the impetus to my vision of the # Break Free Movement and the beginning of my journey from therapist to Life Mastery Coach. As a therapist, my scope of practice is to treat the client within the context of their therapeutic needs. This limits the ability to teach the client on how to show up in their world, be their own healer from the inside out and rise to their highest and most authentic Self. To do this it would require teaching life mastery. The life altering changes come from this Ideal Self where the inner healer resides, and this is the work I knew I was made to do.

By stepping back from my role as a therapist and out of the therapy room, I observed the client’s life on their turf. As I witnessed their pull toward the status quo and the draw to the familiar role as victim, I realized that the learning from the inside out where mastery of evolution is integrated is still lacking for most, despite their progress and healing in the therapy room. I recognized that more training and support is required post therapy and inclusive of the family, community and society. This would require expanding the knowledge, therefore the vision that healing is ongoing and every evolving. As we are not an island unto ourselves, we are all touched by all loss and tragedies, as well as all gains and achievements of everyone around. The last layer of healing and mastery of past trauma is to be healers for others, and this may simply be rising above personal losses and recapturing your true identity, which I call, the Ideal Self. I believe, there is no greater joy that being your authentic self, grasping the lessons gained from every experience and sharing the wisdom as a community for prosperity and continued growth ahead. This momentum creates a contagious energy that, in turn, impacts and aids beyond the individual. Its healing force reaches the communities and societies in untethering and evolving from any and all trauma remnants that hold us back.

As Einstein said, “Once a mind is expanded, it cannot contract.” Once I visualized the formula for rising out of being a victim to survivor to the Ideal Self and how this creates a reversal rippling effect of healing from the individual to the family to the community to society, I couldn’t accept just being a therapist.

This realization broke open my own limited vision. I knew I had to do more because I knew I knew more. As a healer, I knew I had to start helping every person who I worked with and their world in the way that felt most honest to me. By embracing their world and paradigms—starting where they are at, adding my therapeutic flaw (knowledge is power) and creativity, true healing began to happen. And it didn’t stop there. As I witnessed individuals rise out of their victimization, realize they are survivors, they become masters of their lives, I also witnessed the igniting of the reversal rippling effect. That is, as each individual began to show up as their Ideal Self –healing from the inside out and leading the way with an awareness and willingness to extend a hand to another, the mending began to ripple out to their relationships and villages. This is just the beginning.

I have discovered working outside, meeting people in their own environment, is the key for assisting others toward achieving lasting healing and continued growth. Personally, and professionally, I am growing everyday as I get to tap into all I know, use my creative imagination all the while, working together with my community. My natural gifts and talents are used fully as I am free to use my own inspiration and intuitive skills to meet the client, community and society where they are at and guide them to becoming the masters from the inside out. This is very process of evolving to the Ideal Self. By working, modeling and Be-coming what I teach, I know I am in alignment with what I intuitively know is my best way to show up for others. In turn, I am practicing what I preach. This is my evolution from therapist to Live Mastery Coach. There is no turning back, THIS is the vision of the #Break Free Movement for healing in togetherness toward making a difference, starting with one person’s journey rippling through out this world.

I begin with myself. As I show up, live, experiment and play, I model rising above past trauma and living life triumphantly as my Ideal Self. My heart and intention is harmonious with how I work, so that I can be a true catalyst in impacting others with endless potential and evolvement.

My vision does not stop here. The work has progressed in the launching of the #BREAK FREE podcast, an inspired platform that embraces my aspiration of offering a forum for those who have triumphed and now live their Ideal life, where they can share their personal walk through the refiner’s fire to arrive today in a life after trauma. These influencers and mentors offer hope and direction in reaching the life of your dreams. During the podcasts, these masters share their revelatory event(s) from their life to demonstrate how such moments can become catalysts of growth and change. As these personal and life-altering experiences, challenged the core of their identity, they share how these threats became opportunities for deeper growth and greater hope and life purpose.

In turn, #BREAK FREE becomes a community of its own as one person after another supports and assists in the root, rebound and rise journey.

To catch their stories, you can tune into the #BREAK FREE podcast.

There is more, to capture my journey of self-discover, along with the step by step process of evolvement beyond the therapy room, it can be found in my latest bestselling book, Heal Your Trauma, Heal Your Marriage: 7 Steps to Root, Rebound and Rise. To get a FREE copy of this book go to this link:

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